How to learn submission by a father who is less than Godly?  But isn’t that always the case? What man, even a strong Christian, deserves or is capable of earning your respect?  Oh sure there might be times when the glow of his logic is irresistible, but the command is hardly for those times.  Submission is called for precisely when you don’t want to, when it’s difficult, when you have all the reasons why he doesn’t deserve it.   God commands women to submit to their brute because he is a brute, just as he commands husbands to love their shrew when she is at her most shrewish.

I say submit to that father.  Peter says “wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.”  If you learn to submit to an ungodly father, a believing faithful husband should be a piece of cake.  And you might win him to the faith, just as the godly wife does her unbelieving husband.  Without a word.  Peter’s choice of words is so wonderful.  Words can wear down a man, but humble submission is hard to argue with, in fact you don’t even want to argue with it.  You embrace it and buy it flowers.

There is a sense in which submission is for every relationship.  Ephesians 5:21 says “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ”.  Putting other people first is the basic building block of Christianity.  There are always ways to serve others, to give money or time we had planned for ourselves, to someone else, to meet a need.

As to practical ways of learning such submission.  Get some roommates, or move back in with your parents.  Share the intimate details of everyday life with someone else.  At some point they will probably get on your nerves, I believe that is the submission lesson you were looking for.  But better yet, get serious about making yourself available for marriage minded men, rather than safely dating.  Find an elder and his wife in the church who can help you vet willing suitors, so your daughter doesn’t end up with the same problem you have.

I have also found Debbie Maken’s book Getting Serious About Getting Married: Rethinking the Gift of Singleness, to be very helpful on the subject.  It’s even good for kicking some guys in the butt.